Back home? Or away from home?

Transitioning is weird sometimes. I now have two homes that are extremely far away from one another. Two vastly different worlds. Two homes that so far haven't collided in any big way in the sense that they are neatly separate from one another. I am the common denomitor, and none of the people or places are remotely the same.
As the plane took off and gradually got higher, the houses, cars, and town seemed to turn into a gingerbread land. I gazed in amazement and took a moment to realize the miracle of it all. I wanted to have more time to look, just like I wanted to have a bit more time in Ottawa. But the plane glided threw the clouds and seemed to erase everything in a moment. I could no longer see my home in Ottawa and I felt as though I was in the land of nowhere caught between two worlds. Wanting to be a part of both. Both seeming like a distant memory, a dreamland of sort for the time being. I left a lot of ppl and things behind as I was reminded of over the holidays. I've certainly gained a lot in return but the transaction is still bittersweet. The connections I have in Ottawa are deep. The connections I have in Hawaii are becoming deep. I also still feel a strong connection to West Canada.
After all this, I wonder if I am a changed person? I've seen more, learned more, experienced more but I feel as though a big part of me is the same. There were a few days in Ottawa where I felt like I had my old life back. It made me miss certain aspects of it but at the same time re-enforced some of the reasons for why I left....